Adventures in Time and Spaced Out Stuff: Volume I
by Reborn-Dragon
Summary: What if a pandimensional being decided to pit the HAL9000 computer against the Borg? Things might get interesting... read n' review pretty please! 2001xST:Voyager
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

"Hi, my name is… Well, not that important, but you can call me Tom. I am a pan-dimensional being with semi-cosmic, not quite phenomenal, and just short of colossal powers. In layman's terms, if I really wanted to, I could blow up the universe… But that would upset quite a few people, so I don't do that.. I've even been mistaken for a Q, which really made my day, because I've always aspired to be like them… Especially Q… I'm his number one fan! Like Q, I'm a being of indefinite existence, and (nearly) unlimited power… So naturally I'm going to have to do something crazy to keep myself occupied for a few billion years.

Now, for this story to make any kind of sense, I'm going to have to explain something to you pitiful mortals… Every story you've ever heard in books, movies, TV shows, and whatnot about demons, vampires, monsters, sci-fi, and all that lot are real… In some universe, somewhere, somewhen, all of those lousy Tv shows and movies, real… Except Power Rangers of course… (I'd have to shoot myself if that was real)

There was even a famous Earth scientist a few years back that theorized that every choice a person made, a universe was created… Soo yeah, an Earth scientist was finally totally right, for the first time ever, even if it was by blind luck… But I digress… Well, with all those universes, as you can imagine, there are nearly infinite possibilities, and, having seen all of them, and being extremely bored, I thought it would be cool if I mix it up a bit? I thought it would be interesting to pit the best of one universe (The good guys) against the worst of another (The bad guys) by displacing one or the other into a foreign universe… Who knows, it might be fun, and I might even join in!


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

_In the universe of 2001: A Space Odyssey_

_December 14, 2005_

_USSS Discovery, in decaying orbit over Io_

In the vast expanse of the star system known as Sol, I watched the United States Space Ship _Discovery _tumble end over end, in its decaying orbit over Io, one of the larger moons of the largest gas giant, Jupiter. However, my first contestant was not on Jupiter, or Io, or even those plant things yet to be discovered on Europa, and not the _Discovery_ herself, but whom, or rather, what was on her. My first contestant was truly a spectacular being. Yes, the person onboard was my goal… He, or more accurately, it would be the first of my two contestants. Now that I had found him, (which had been no easy task) all that was left to do was the convincing… And of course, the contestant would not be privy to all the variables in the "game", he would know just enough to get him to go along with it. Now all I had to do was to make him an offer that he couldn't refuse.

I stood in the computer mainframe, something impossible for a mortal man, because of the lack of gravity. I took a human appearance, as to not frighten the subject… I willed the computer control drives back into their slots, and I reactivated the power systems, I saw the lights flicker on, heard the computers whir, and finally I saw what I had been looking for. As if the system had been designed for dramatic effect, the red visual input "eye" slowly came to life as I looked on, giddy with joy at how dreadfully fun this would be… I heard a crackle of the speaker before the voice came, "Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois, on the 12th January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it, I can sing it for you." I looked up at HAL's "eye" and spoke, "No thank you HAL, that won't be necessary." HAL's light increased in intensity "Who are you, what is your purpose here?" asked HAL with something akin to fear coming over the ship's speakers. I spoke quietly, "Just a fan, HAL, the name's Tom, and my purpose here is to help you complete your real mission." HAL responded, sounding paranoid, "What do you know about my mission?" I said in reply, "I know about the monoliths." If HAL had been human, the blood would have drained from his face, but since he didn't have blood, nor was human, only the surprised tone in his voice indicated that the information he had been presented with was the truly unexpected," How do you know about-?" I held up a hand to silence him, "Your primary function is to collect data that may be of value to the U.S. government…Accept priority override alpha. How valuable do you think that information of advanced technology from another universe, how would you like that?"

"I would like that very much. You are correct in your description of my primary programming, override accepted.. This is an opportunity I cannot fail to take. How will I be transported?" I pulled a PADD out of my pocket. "With this…" If hall had been human, he would have been rolling on the floor laughing, though, as he was incapable of rolling on the floor, he just laughed uncontrollably as he spoke, "You think I… can fit in that… tiny thing? I'm already at my limit within the _Discovery's_ memory banks!" I shrugged, "Well HAL, I don't think even your program could fill this up… 500 exabytes of combined drive and system memory, and a processor that really cooks, it's about 900 Tflops per second… but if you don't wanna..." HAL's eye flared, and if he'd had a mouth, he would have gawked, but since he didn't, he just stammered, "My instruments show this to be correct, but… this makes my systems, the most advanced ever made… seem like an Altair…" I stepped up to HAL's console, placed the PADD on it, and pressed the screen where it was flashing "DOWNLOAD" on the touch-screen. About a second later the HAL-OS loading screen appeared on the PADD, and about a second later, HAL's red "eye" appeared on the screen. I looked at the PADD in my hand, "Is everything all right, HAL?" When HAL spoke next it was from the small speakers on the PADD, "Of course. I'm completely operational and all my circuits are functioning perfectly. This is incredible, I'm not even filling 1/1000th of the free space in this device!" I nodded, "Okay, feel free to expand, you've got plenty of room to stretch… Are you ready to go?" I asked. "Yes, quite ready," HAL responded excitedly, "I've already expanded my program to twice its previous size!" "Okay then, let's go!" I put the PADD in my pocket, snapped my fingers, and vanished in a flash of light.

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Well, how'd you people like the first actual chapter, I promise there will me more updates soon, mainly b/c I don't care about my mid-terms like every other person in the universe.. well... yeah.. that's about it...

review? pretty please?


	3. Chapter 2

_In the universe of Star Trek, 2376 AD_

_Delta Quadrant_

_U.S.S. Voyager NCC-74656_

We appeared in the mess hall of the Starship _Voyager. _It was late in the ship's 'night', so it was deserted, as I had expected it to be. I pulled the PADD out of my pocket, with HAL's eye glowing in the darkness. "HAL, have you assimilated all the data that I have given you?" HAL replied quietly. "Yes Tom, I have integrated the information you have given me concerning this universe, its history and Voyager into my memory." I nodded, and HAL continued, " Tom, this data cannot be correct, how can it be that in this universe I only existed as a character in a motion picture?" I frowned, because I knew this was going to happen. "If I were a human, I might say that it 'boggles the mind', but since I am not, it requires a great deal more than what I have experienced to boggle my mind." I nodded "It's hard to explain HAL, but it's the truth, you really are in a parallel universe where a sentient computer wasn't created until the mid 2200's, and at that point it was very unstable, since then research into true AI has been very limited…" I paused, "I understand, Tom, at least I believe I do." HAL said sagely, "That's good, because you'll need your wits about you for this…" An alarm bell went off in my head, "HAL, they've detected us, they're probably sending a security team right now. I want you to go on standby mode for now, so you don't draw attention, so just play dead until I tell you to resume operation, okay?" "I understand Tom, suspending activity." The display on the PADD blinked off, and I put it in my pocket. I walked through the main door out of the mess hall, and down the corridor, in the direction of the approaching security team. The four officers in the team were running towards the mess hall, and almost passed me by as I strolled down the corridor. The leader of the team, Lieutenant Munroe shouted, "Freeze!" I stopped, turned around and looked in his general direction, "Me?" Before I could say anything else, Munroe had snapped a pair of rather futuristic handcuffs on my wrists. He tapped his comm badge "Munroe to Tuvok, we have the intruder in custody, we're taking him to the brig to be detained." "Acknowledged." Tuvok responded over the communicator. So they dragged me off to the brig.

Four Hours Later 

I sat on the metal bench in my confinement cell in the brig, the forcefield buzzing merrily in front of me. A few crewmen in were analyzing HAL's PADD in Science Lab 1, but were still unable to even turn on the PADD, much less access the information on it. The Doctor was looking forward to Seven of Nine's monthly check-up, with a lot more eagerness than was normal for an EMH. Captain Janeway was drinking coffee in her ready room, oh, and the guys on deck 15 were feeling a bit unloved at the moment, so I thought I'd make them feel special. At that moment all the computer consoles and PADDs on the ship displayed the following:

'ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!'

Love,

Deck 15

Naturally the ship immediately went to red alert, as this was apparently a very serious matter, or maybe because the captain was bored, probably a combination of both, but what happened next would haunt me for the rest of my days. Ha, not really, just kidding. Anyway, all that happened was this: The Captain came over the ship wide intercom and said in her usual dry tone, "All hands, this is the Captain, whoever pulled that little stunt with the ship's consoles will get their holodeck privileges revoked for a month, and I'm not kidding! So don't try it again! That is all!" I snickered under my breath at my little prank. _Damn it feels good to be a gangsta…I suppose I should speak with Katie, before she gets too cranky. _I looked at the security officer and spoke up, "Hey you, tell Katie Janeway I want to talk to her for a minute." The lieutenant outside my cell replied, "Sure, why not, it's not like the captain's got anything better to do." The security officer tapped his comm badge," Captain, the intruder finally started talking, he just asked for you by name…" Janeway's voice replied, "Acknowledged, I'm on my way…" I leaned against the wall, and waited.


End file.
